hahahaha.. Growing up, meditation was a part of my school's morning assembly.
Since it was a forced practice I developed hate for this whole concept. It was years later that I realised that I am not my mind's conceptual reality. It was my initiative to practice meditation on my own that revealed me my true self. As my practice grew stronger I started to take things easily and notice my emotional patterns. I was able to separate myself from my thoughts and my reactive behaviours. It was exhilarating to find this power at first and then it became my overall personality. Until I hit what I considered "a rock bottom" of my then reality. I went back to my old patterns, stayed in a negative haze for a few days. I had to reach the lowest of my inner reality, which of course took me down the path of hallucinations and severe negative thoughts loops. I emerged out of it one morning completely fresh and renewed. The effect of my previously practised meditation sessions trained a part of my psyche to come back to the centre. The appreciation for life was felt at an immense level. Things appeared new as If I was seeing them for the first time. I was living in a paradigm of "I" as in self-cantered, prior to this new reality. My focus would stay sharp and bright all day and I'd start to feel it fading away as evenings approached. Since then I have been aware of this feeling. Now and then I still see myself going up and down emotionally but the awareness is there in the background. It saves me every time I am caught. Awareness itself is experiencing this experience called life. I am not a label, I am not just another "I" , I simple am the creation and the creator of the reality I chose to create. If you're reading this then know it for yourself that you and I are essentially one. The sight of me creates a me that YOU perceive, that still is YOU in a real sense. Amazing thing is that once we develop this practice, just by being somewhere you start to change your environments. People's behaviour tend to reflect your inner compassion. In a weird way, it feels like you're in a new world. Same people, same relationships, same locations but a higher quality. Love with-in reflects love with-out. So yeah.. give mediation a shot! its kinda worth it lol
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