Intelligence of Heart
by Jacob George
(Kochi, Kerala, India)
Intelligence of Heart.
"I shall begin with some some real life incidents that happened to me.
Incident 1: one day I was traveling in a general compartment of a train. To be precise it was the 2.30PM train to Chennai from Trivandrum. It was the time after Diwali holidays so the train was heavily crowded. A group of students had occupied a section of the compartment and they were occupying the top seats too (intended for luggage), and there were ladies too. The students at the top had to climb down to share some food with their friends at bottom. All students climbed down with ease except one girl, who didn’t know how to climb down. Her friends at bottom started to joke and laugh at her, joined by some co passengers, like “if you don’t know to climb down why did you go up”. Immediately after the laughing ceased, a girl from the bottom birth got up and walked down to the aisle (where normally people climb up/down). She gestured to her friend to climb down. Her friend on top told her that she was afraid, to which she gestured with her hand that “don’t worry, If any thing awkward happens I will take care”. Astonishingly the other girl climbed down with little or no help from the one at bottom. I thought of standing up and applauding at the instant. But showed a thumbs up sign to the other girl to which she nodded (thankfully).
Back during my train journey I kept pondering over what type of intelligence had the girl used which made her rise meteorically like a hero, for some (at least one) during the situation. Was it her academic skills that mattered?
Incident 2: A couple of months back I was undertaking the same train. A local vendor (an old lady) was selling some eatables. After making her sale, tired of the days work, she asked a passenger sitting at the window seat to kindly let her sit, as she was feeling headache and she could breathe fresh air. He refused. A local passenger sitting at the aisle row (near to the window), got up and offered his seat. He left at the direction of exit, towards the back side of the coach. I joined him. He told me that he didn’t have the money nor the need to buy what the old lady was selling. But he was thinking of how he can be of help to the vendor. It was much like a God-sent opportunity for him, to help the old lady! When I returned to my seat I could find the vendor cracking joke with another old lady sitting next to her!
Incident 3: This happened during my first job. I was in sales, and our company was a hardcore sales organization. There was a particular friend of mine who had engineering as well as a management degree. Since we were in sales we would have parties after our month end on reaching our targets. Drinks were common in such parties. This particular friend (say X) of mine would not take drinks during college days or not so far. To make our boss feel elated we told him that sir X has not taken drinks so far, but maybe you can make him drink today. We all sat in a room for the routine and my boss announced that Mr X is joining us tonight for drinks. Though my friend resisted, in the end he succumbed to what my boss demanded. We all thought our boss had won. He asked to place glasses as per the head count. Drinks were poured in each glasses. My boss declared that Mr X would start the party today by sipping first. We all told 'cheers' raising our glasses. Then something unusual happened. My friend X dropped his glass on the table, looked straight into the eyes of my boss and said ”Boss, even if none among us is going to drink a peg more from these glasses again, I won't touch this glass any more!” We all knew our boss had a terrible anger (he had told not to drop our glasses without drinking a sip after saying cheers), but instead he told us 'Mr X won't join us tonight for drinks'. Lets us
drink and enjoy. Mr X joined us for the party, but did not take any drinks.
The next day at office I just asked my friend where did he get the courage to tell NO to my boss. My friend laughed at me and a bit hesitantly told me his story:
His mother took much pains to see him through his studies. His father was a drunkard. While he was a kid, he was the eldest (he had two younger sisters), his father would come home drunk and fight with his mother and beat her for not giving him the money to drink. His mother would silently suffer all these but took a promise from him while he was a kid. When he grew up he WON'T drink. My friend then told me “tomorrow I may stand to lose my job / career. But I am not worried. I don’t want to break the promise given to my mother”. Frankly I fumbled for words. I did not know how to answer him. That day when I went to my bosses' cabin I knew I had a job in hand.
We have addressed the instances that happened. Well what was in these situations that mattered? I recall my childhood lessons where we studied a subject which had less than an hour a week. I am talking of moral science. It reminded myself that this is the most important subject, because you can forget all the subjects on your academics but not this one, because it teaches you how to live. We all know of the intelligence of the brain and we term ourselves as intelligent beings. There are well known methods to measure intelligence of the brain like IQ tests and academic brilliance. But does brain alone has intelligence for us intelligent beings?
Recalling the incidents mentioned above in none of the cases it was a case of intelligence of the brain that mattered. It was something else that mattered that made them stand up in the situation, a deviation from the normal phase. I have brushed through the available resources, but all speak of intelligence of brain alone, but there is something beyond, intelligence of something else, INTELLIGENCE OF THE HEART. It can be associated with the term Emotional Intelligence (EI). It speaks of intelligence of the heart!
I have tried to observe these kind of people, and have found the following common traits of people with a high amount of Intelligence of the Heart (IH).
1. At Perfect Harmony with Themselves : This is a distinguishing feature of IH people. IH people are always at perfect harmony with themselves. They enjoy / indulge in solitude more than anyone else. They tend not to escape rather enjoy it. This can be more pronounced / observed during journey times. People try all sort of things like sleeping, Reading , Listening to music , Playing games, Doing work, operate laptop etc to escape the boredom. But IH people on the other hand rather than escaping, indulge in it. They observe things around them , Watch nature etc and don’t make others feel they are bored. They enjoy solitude rather than avoid it.
2. Authentic : Authencity -- What is the word meaning. Does it have anything to do with the moral fabric of a person? It simply can be said as the power to be oneself. IH people are authentic. Their direction and priorities are clear.
3. Honest : IH people are honest. They stand up to any situation were they require to exhibit this trait.
4. Respect the other sex: IH people respect and honour the opposite sex.
5. Observers : IH people are keen observers . They are aware of the situations around them. They observe other people, things around them as well nature.
6. Thinkers : IH people are good thinkers. They use the help of their brains in making judgments / conclusions.
7. Proactive : Proactive ness notes their ability to master situations. Rather than being a slave to situations they master the given situation. Proactive ness notes their ability to guess how a situation would unfold and hence act accordingly. Proactive rather than reactive.
8. Logical : IH people have a definite reason / Logic for everything. They do things / arrive at judgments based on this logic."